I fell!

So the other day I met up with a group of my girlfriends, 4 of them being new mothers (all babies under 9 months old). Obviously the topic of baby weight came up at some point. I have to admit, child-bearing is such a nasty thing when it comes to weight issues; all these girls, though having been pretty little things before the babies now all need to lose a considerable amount of weight! Ugh.

I found out that 2 of them had started doing aerobics at a military gym --- well, a gym in a military camp about 15 minutes drive away from my house. They spoke of the intensity, etc. and one was saying how she ran away because it was all too much for her. But me being hardcore me, that didn't scare and I wanted to see for myself. And at only 20 bucks a month (less than a tenth of what I would pay at the gym I've been intending to join next week) I couldn't pass it up. I decided I would try it and if it doesn't work then I would go to the original gym.

So, yesterday another friend and I decided to go. Oh, was it intense!!! Unfortunately I missed the beginning of the class, and when I walked in they were really moving. Then we stopped and people dispersed...I was surprised because I heard the classes were 1 hour long, but I thought there was a chance it was over because I WAS TIRED! But nope, that was just the warm up!!! Lol. But guess what, I stuck it out. I stayed for the whoel class though I was just dragging myself towards the end.

Then the cool down/stretching part came and we had to pair up. Luckily I ended up pairing with someone I was comfortable with, size-wise. But it was hard for us to find balance during the stretches. At one point we were each holding each other's leg up, and when we could stand up straight I let her go so we could start over, but she wouldn't let my leg go! I repeatedly asked her to let go but she raised my leg even higher, till I fell on my bum. Stupid woman.

So that was my first day there. But, I wasn't one bit embarassed! I'm not ashamed to go back, and if it wasn't that I'm feeling so tired from the work out adn late night yesterday I would go back today. But I'll skip and go tomorrow.

Another Monday

Just can't be bothered to work up a title...
What ever happened to September?
I know it's been a busy month but to think there are only 4 more days and we'll be onto the last quarter of 2011 feels seriously ridiculous. Some say it's a sign of aging... Oh well.

So, what's up for the last quater of the year?
- Definitely going back to gym as soon as I'm back from long weekend!

That's about all I can honestly commit to at the moment. Everything else has loose plans that may or may not stick. I'll update as everything works out.

 The weekend was ok, but Sunday I had a hangover, first time I ever felt like that. Didn't want to do anything after the cake delivery early in the afternoon. I just vegged out for the rest of the day...

Now it's Monday and I'm back at work. And as usually happens, I'm trying something which I hope may soon be made into a routine. Lol. Hope it amounts to something this tiem because I badly need it.

A - Z of ME...

A - Z of ME....

Something fun to do...let's not focus on the failing journey for once! Found this on 4ATHOMEJ's blog  (A Little Less...Of Me) and thought why not play!?

 

A. Age - 33 (34 in Dec) --- I don't know when I'll start owning it!
B. Bed size - Queen

C. Chore you dislike - Laundry, by hand

D. Dogs - none. I had a puppy when I was little but don't think I can deal with the energy it takes to keep one plus a little boy!

E. Essential start to your day - Made up bed

F. Favorite color - White and black together

G. Gold or silver - Silver
H. Height - 5'4"
I. Instruments you play(ed) - drum

J. Job title - For which job?? Main income is from Lab Quality Manager one.

K. Kids - 1 boy

L. Live - Gaborone, Botswana

M. Mom's name - Nyaladzi

N. Nicknames - Oh and Khali

O. Overnight hospital stays - only 2 - when I was in a car accident and when I had my son.

P. Pet peeves - Ugh, broken promises, why promise??
Q.Quote from a movie - I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a guy....etc. - Julia Roberts to Hugh Grant in Nottinghill.

R. Righty or Lefty - Righty
S. Siblings - 3 - 2 younger brothers and 1 younger sister
T. Time you wake up - Anywhere between 5.25 and 6.30am on weekdays, later on free  weekends.
U. Underwear - all the time, different types

V. Vegetables you don't like - brussel sprouts and asparagus

W. What makes you run late - I'm naturally slow?

X. X-rays you've had - I remember chest, foot, and back after car accident

Y. Yummy food you make - cakes and other baked stuff

Z. Zoo animal favorites - don't know

 

Just being

Honestly I'm tired. Physically right now, but what I'm talking about is that I am just tired of tring and trying to lose weight. Day in and day out worrying about what, when and how to eat, what, if any exercise to do, etc. I'm just sick of it all. I'm sick of worrying about binges and high calories and wanting but failing to stick with a diet long enough to see a change. It's got to stop.

So. I throw in the towel. I'm going to stop fighting with myself everyday. I just need to sort myself out and figure out how to take care of myself without fighting with my natural desires or tendencies. I just want to make peace with myself and my body. I want to bring a kinship between my body and my mind. Perhaps then I can address the weight issues in a healthier non-obsessive manner.

Do you know anyone who weighs themself everyday, every single morning? Hoping to see a loss even though they know they ate crappily the day before, or even the whole week before? I'm sure in a psychologist's book that carries some meaning...so I want to explore that. I think I mentioned before that I want to seek help; I intend to, I just haven't made the first step because I've been so busy lately. But I've taken the first step - I've admitted that I have a problem well beyond my capabilities to solve.  Now I just need to make a call and make an appointment.

But besides the weight issues, it's been busy. Sometimes fun, other times not. The most fun I've had lately was attending the wedding expo in Jo'burg, South Africa, this past weekend! It made me wish I was planning my wedding - the beauty of all on display...I could just swoon over it. Good times.

Spring has sprung!

So goes my ' blog bling'. I started using this template waaaayy before spring, because I was just sick and tired and was longing for spring. But now...Spring really has sprung! It is nice and warm and I'm confident that it's going to stay this way and get warmer. It's unfortunate that it will get reaaaaally hot in a couple of weeks, or less. Still prefer warm to cold weather though :)

So, it was winter. First  I stopped walking outside because it was too dark in the morning  - but I also pretended I didn't have a treadmill, kind of - I didn't use it after all. Then I stopped going to the gym when I was not well for a couple of weeks - but two weeks ran into 2 months. Then I just threw caution to the wind and kind of forgot everything about being healthy - Eating when I want and not working out at all. Then I started a liquid diet - which lasted 2 weeks, but gave visible results in that short period! But then, I lost and here I am.

That was August. Very short. Busy. No way to really define it in terms of my health. My highest was on the 2nd of August, my lowest on the 15th or so. But of course the month is ending at a higher weight than my lowest. Though I'm happy to say I lost 5+ pounds this month, I can't say I feel any healthier than I did at the beginning of the month.

So I want September to be different - I want to end it healthier than today. I'm travelling 3 weekends in September, and my cake business is really picking up. But I'm going to really really try to work around these and any other obstacles and come out on the other side prouder of myself than I am today.

So, here's to September:
- Continue morning walks started on Monday
- Make a plan to return to gym
- Taste the cakes - this is improtant - but do not eat all the off cuts
- Bake for business, but if needed for the family make it healthy.
- Continue the breakfast and luch plans
- Seriously look at and plan dinners.