Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Modern technology

I'm sooo thankful for modern technology that has reunited me old old friends that I've always known will be friends for life. Even during the lulls I knew they were there among the stars as I was there amongst their stars - isn't that what friends are, each other's twinkling stars.
I've missed you, I miss you and hopefully one day we'll be in the same room again.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Back to the grind

I'm thankful for support systems and systems in general that allow me to take a break from the regular stuff once in a while. I managed to get time off work and my family cared for my son, so I was able to drive off into neighbouring South Africa for some fun time. I enjoyed every minute of it, from the ride down (it helped that I didn't drive at all except when I had to park the car at the border on the way back) to the down time in the hotel room. Fun times. We need to do that more.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

T'was my birthday!

I'm thankful for life, and love in all it's forms.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Personal transport

I'm thankful for my little car that gets me where I want to go when I want to go. It's easy to take having a car for granted, but it just takes a single day without it and having to use public transport to appreciate it. Add bad weather and you appreciate your car tons more. The only down side to driving is that it decreases your chances of 'naturally' incorporating physical exercise into your life. So, in appreciation of my car, and myself, I will drive whenever I need to, but I'll really think about whether I need to drive or not before I turn the ignition on.

Monday, November 15, 2010


I'm thankful that I am so 'young at heart' and so easily excited. I'm extremely excited about my birthday on Wednesday, and perhaps even more excited about the christmas season coming up. Seeing all the decorations already up in the stores and malls has me giddy. I can't wait till I can decorate my house. I'll do it on the 25th (American Thanksgiving day) when I'm off of work.

I'm taking 3 days off this week to celebrate my birthday!! I have a lot planned, including an out of town trip where I'll be on the look out for new christmas decorations for the house. Why isn't everyone around me as excited as I am about christmas?? Of course it's only one day, BUT there's a whole season around it. I started seeing the first decorations this year in October, that's at the very least 2.5 months in advance of the day, and you want to tell me it only 1 day? I'll always be a little girl when it comes to christmas, and can only hope that my kids will love it as much as I do.

Anyway, on the regular stuff...I'm still taking my hiatus. Enjoying everyday without much worries. I have overdone the last few days but have given myself permission not to beat myself up about it. In the process I've learned how to make the most amazing pizza. I've had pizza from a thousand places the world over, but believe me when I say I have never tasted any as great as what I made on Friday. I also baked some chewy cookies that my son absolutely loves and will be getting often. Tonight I'm making some moroccan chicken curry to go with rice. It's a Weigh Less recipe that I love and have made several times already.

As for gym I'll go when I get back from my little trip. I'm sure there'll be lots of walking on that trip which should prime me for starting regular work outs.

Other than that, I'm constantly thinking about how I should give myself the next 2 years of my life, 33rd to 35th birthday to live my best life while attempting to find the real me. Be more feisty and just enjoy life more. I'm sure going to attempt to live more. Just have to come up with a plan, and it's probably time I made up my bucket list...

Friday, November 12, 2010

Half day Fridays!!

I'm thankful that on Fridays I get to go home (or rather leave work) at 1.30pm. I cherish these few hours off because, other than holidays, it's the perfect time to do things I can only do on week days, that otherwise I would not have a chance to do. Usually I find myself getting home later than I do on other days, but with what I would have accomplished in comparison (personal matters, not work), it's okay. Today I don't have lots of plans though, just going home and playing with my son since he's not at school today.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Double benefits

I'm thankful for the privilege to benefit from both my country's and American holidays. This means that I get about twice as many days off of work, not charged to me, as the average person in the country. This, and the half day Fridays are some of the top things I'll miss about this jobs when I leave. *The day was very productive, I'm pleased*

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Inside information

I'm thankful to be privy to news that has me sooo excited before the general population knows! The next Gaborone Marathon will be in April next year, so I get to have a head start in my training --- because I want to run at least the 4 or 5K, whichever one they do. I'm so excited for it.

Yep, that means I got a jolt to get off of my tush and start the C25K. I soooo want to run the 5K next year. This year I walked with my son in the stroller, and it was hard. But next year I'm determined to run. So, I'm going back to the gym immediately following my birthday and hitting the treadmill. It is the oddest thing that I can go to gym just to hop on the treadmill, yet I have one of my own, and a pretty good one too. Somehow I just can't summon the motivation to use it anymore. In the past few weeks I've considered loaning it to my mom, because what's the point of having it occupying valuable space while she could make good use of it? Think I'll have to think that through again because I may just want to use it at times when I can't make gym.

Ohhh, please please let this training for the marathon finally be my ticket to getting serious and making some progress... I am going to ride it as much as possible, and God knows I'm soo ready for some progress.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

The rainy season is here

I'm thankful for the rain that has come to relieve us of the heat that had descended so unrelentingly upon us. If it just keeps on raining while we sleep or don't need to be out-doors then I'm all for it. Woza malam'lela! Pula!

Monday, November 8, 2010

Great weekend, or not...

I'm thankful for nice, restful weekends. They are rare, so when one comes along it is truly cherished.

After our weekend plans fell through on Saturday, we resolved to not make any new plans and just use the weekend to sort of recharge and get some much-needed rest. I only left the house 2 times between Saturday and Sunday. Once to get a very necessary ingredient for a recipe, and then to make the weekly grocery run.

Rest we did. It was quiet, if you discount the constant chatter of a 2 year old, and we really enjoyed being in-doors the whole time.

Of course, there's a down side to all of this. That recipe for which I had to get an ingredient - really bad-for-your-heart stuff. And we ate, ate, ate. And we drank, drank, drank. Both soft and hardish. We concluded the weekend with a very late supper, which comprised of brunch-like foods. So, there you have it. A weekend of zero activity, and high consumption.

That means, weight was up this morning, obviously. I stress too much about my weight. I think about it all the time, and yet I'm not making any progress at all. Somehow I always self-sabotage if I make even the smallest progress. Could it be because par fo me misses something when I do lose? Ugh, I don't get it.

Anyway, this is what I'm thinking. Between now and my birthday I'm giving myself a chance to just exist without worrying about what I weigh. I will not worry what every move I make means to my weight status. I will just be, and I'll see what happens. No, this is not an excuse to over-indulge, not at all. I'll go to gym when I feel especially moved to go, I will not force myself. I will feed my body nutritiously, not  with junky substances. And on the morning of my birthday I will see if I have gained or not. That's all. Not a plan really, just letting go for a bit.

Friday, November 5, 2010

I've been baking

I am thankful for all the things that I may take for granted on a day to day basis. A roof over my head, air conditioning - a total necessity in this heat, a car to take me places whenever I want, clean water, food, electricity, a well-functioning body. And just about enough money for me to afford the basics. And my job, for as long as I have it.

So I've been baking. A lot. Even during the week. My downfall has been food blogs. I browse around and often I come something that looks just irresistible and easy to make. So I bring out the recipe, make sure I have all the right ingredients and I go to town. So, far I've been successful with each single recipe. My latest was a rich fruit cake that turned out very well, and everyone who got a taste of it was just raving about it. Which means I'm not so bad. But, it also means that my 'taster' will suffer the consequences of this incessant baking. Guess who the taster is??

Myself, of course.

Another 'confession'? I haven't been to gym at all this week. Excuse, after excuse, after excuse. Some really legitimate, but others, not so much. And I just won't dwell on it, what's the point?

And last, at least for today... I have decided not to renew my Weigh-Less membership at the moment. I have not been following the plan properly and know I can't fool myself thinking another 3 months membership right now will make me make a 180. I told my online group leader that I will resume as soon as I feel that I'm ready to make the commitment.

Where does that leave me?
Struggling of course, recycling the same 5 pounds over and over. But it also leaves me with a resolve to not gain any more than that 5 pounds above my lowest this year. I'd love to be losing of course, but in the absence of losses, maintaining is acceptable. Not weight gain. I'm not motivated right now to chase the numbers down, though there are motivators left, right and centre, but I'm determined to continue eating healthily, and move as much as possible.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

I am thankful

My birthday month is also thanksgiving month for Americans. Ever since I discovered Thanksgiving day, I've wished that it was something we celebrated here. But fortunately, there's no reason why I can't just choose to celebrate along with the Americans, and also I've always worked in organizations originating from the US, hence working with Americans and getting to celebrate along with them holidays that I would otherwise maybe not aware of.

Anyway, I have so much to be thankful for. When I look around myself, I can see that I am truly blessed. I am blessed first of all by having been born into this country. Peace, tranquility, stability. I can't imagine being from elsewhere.

I've decided that for the rest of the month I'm going to post a blog saying what I'm thankful for that day. One or two or more things. I'm even getting ahead of myself right now thinking of all the things that bring me joy, make life easier, and just plain make me glad to be me.

I'm looking forward to doing this and wish I had started on the first.

First: I am thankful that I am aware of, and I am able to celebrate, Thanksgiving this month along with my American friends. I am thankful for this platform to celebrate all the great things, and not so great things that help me grow in to a better person day after day.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Birthday month

Another November. I turn 33 this year. 33 used to sound ancient, but now it feels just ok. I don't feel old at all, and people close to me have tried to convince me that I don't look older than my age, I don't know if I'm convinced.

I remember my 22nd birthday, 11 years ago. I treated myself to a pizza in my dorm room, after weighing myself and telling myself I was going to lose weight and be fit and trim by my 23rd birthday. Those I think were the most confused years of my life. I worked out, come rain, shine or snow, if you may. But I also ate probably more than I ever have in my whole life. I'm telling you, living in the US is the worst thing that has ever happened to me 'weight-wise'. What I can't figure out is why I kept both contradicting behaviours? Weird even to me.

This morning I looked at a note book I kept 2 years ago. I weighed close to 10 pounds less than I do today. Very odd since for the past two years I've been trying to lose weight. I guess I'm your typical yo-yo. I lose some and I gain some and guess which is more??

Anyway. October was my worst month since I re-embarked on this journey a few months ago. I gained weight overall. But that's fine, because I can not undo it. It's what I do from now on that matters. So I have to sit with myself and set things straight. Plan. And do.

I'll be 33 in 16 days.